Charles (@charzaar07)

you know 2 of my biggest fears are losing myself and knowing exactly what I've lost but still not being capable of getting it back. the other fear is more of a collective for everyone and somewhat ingrained on a biological level, the fear of being alone.. i was traumatized by some and I still crawled back two different times and probably would again if given the opportunity. my only guesses why I would do something so blatantly stupid is ether trying to untraumatize myself or the need to have not been wrong about being with him in the first place and justify my still at the time prevalent Feelings. the only thing that resulted was me becoming a shell ney a husk of a person long gone. the only thing I thought of was him, the only reason I got up in the morning was the hope of a future with him. now I am metaphorically off leash i have no direction and no drive of my own or for myself. now I know not what to do, all i know is that im lost thrashing around in the muck blind, dumb and, alone. to top that my true dreams in life will never be able to become reality so I can only ever settle, thats all I can ever do in life, settle... good luck we all need it.

How you create art can show a lot about how you think, and the way you present yourself will tell lot about your art. The need to create is the only thing you have, just keep creating and always try hard. if you don't try but you still get the outcome you want you never really wanted it. If you didn't want it enough to try than you never truly wanted it. Good luck